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This article was published on February 18th, 2022
Divorce can be one of the most stressful events that you have to go through in life, let alone when there are children involved. It is only natural to want there to be as little impact on your children as possible during this time, but it can be difficult to know where to start. We have created the ultimate guide to a child-centred divorce.
A child-centred approach to divorce focuses on the needs of the children first and foremost. Whilst it is still important to consider factors such as your legal rights and finances, the emphasis is placed upon how the process is affecting the children. Typically, a child-centred approach to divorce involves making decisions that focus on your children’s needs, and where their lives will be impacted as little as possible.
If you have made the difficult decision to get a divorce, now is a good time to consider what is best for your children and what will help them deal with any changes that may happen when the process begins.
To prepare for a child-centred divorce it is important to know what your children’s needs are; whether that is having an open discussion with them, providing they are old enough to understand, or talking to the other parent about the expectations in regards to the separation, ensuring that you are both on the same page when it comes to your children’s needs.
Another important thing to do is educate yourself about handling changes that will come up during a child-centred divorce. If you inform yourself ahead of time, it will be easier for you and your children to adjust. For example, if one parent is going to move away with the children after the divorce, it may be helpful for them to visit before they move so that they can become familiar with their new surroundings and adjust before being there full-time.
There are many ways you can make the divorce process easier on your children. Children are resilient and will do their best to adjust, but it’s important that they still feel loved and taken care of.
The first and most important aspect of a child-centred approach to a divorce is to keep communication open with your co-parent. This can seem like a difficult thing to do at first because as with any separation there are lots of emotions involved, but try to keep in mind that you both have the same goal, to minimise the emotional upheaval for your children.
It is also important to communicate with your children at each stage of the separation. It may be helpful to create a list of questions for them about how they feel about the divorce, what worries them, and anything else they may want to talk about.
Always try to include your child in important decisions. The voice of the child is all about including your children, where appropriate in some of the decisions that you will take whilst you are establishing your new normal and beyond.
Let your kids know that there is no wrong reaction or emotion. Every separation is different and every child is unique, children will react differently depending on their age, gender and character and it is important to validate their emotions.
Here at Thorneycroft Solicitors, we understand that separation is a difficult time for all the family. As experienced family solicitors, we understand how traumatic and complex family disputes can be. Our strong legal guidance, professional divorce advice and empathetic approach aim to minimise some of the emotional upheavals at what can be a very stressful time.
We are members of Resolution, the code of practice as members means we always try to resolve matters constructively. Our approach to dealing with divorce is on an amicable and conciliatory basis.
If you are considering a divorce and would like some advice on how to approach a child-centred divorce, get in touch today. To speak to a member of our specialist team, call 0800 1979345 or fill out our simple enquiry form.